Social Security and Magic Ponies

Devilstower's Congratulations, Citizen! begins with

Back on 2001, right after Inauguration Day, $10,000 of your Social Security funds were placed in a special private personal magic pony account where it would enjoy the explosive benefits of the our surging prosperity, and the Longest Peacetime Terra-fightin' Expansion in HISTORY... History... history. All of this made possible by cutting taxes on the productive people at the top of the food chain and removing those regulations that prevented our financial institutions from using all their imagination in creating new ways to loan give... to give you money! We at the Treasury know there was some discussion about not going along with the president's plan, but I think you'll agree that what we've learned over the last seven years is that the president can do anything he wants and no one will do more than talk about stopping him. So we just did it! Say, why not send us a subpoena? That'd be a hoot!

Now, as we close in on the last year of this glorious wondertime, here's a quick report on how your outsourced, privately-managed fund has done.

Scary stuff courtesy of Bu$hCo and that's before the collapse of all those bad mortgages. Peace .. or War!